Not Dead Yet

Hmmm. Where to begin.

First, I am not sure that I have killed anything (yet). I am still blogging , and I still use a telephone. So I do not think we need to abandon all technology (yet). There are certainly proper and improper usage for things such as cell phones. I think I am approaching an acceptable practice of blogging both here and at our communal page. I do not know how to use a cell phone properly, most likely because I have a general aversion to telephones.

Second, I am arguing from a position of weakness here. I do not know how to go forward. I am not sitting here waiting for someone to ask me "How do I go on?" so I can tell them all they need to know. I would very much like to know that myself. I am merely pointing out that modern "conveniences" often warp the very thing they are intended to preserve. I seriously doubt that this is a very innovative claim, and I know it is not very constructive.

Third, I am not advocating a "minimalist" approach to community. We need not pare away every single thing that is not a perfect representation of what relations are meant to be. If we did so, we would certainly be very alone. We would do well to be cautious in how we use our tools, how we approach our neighbor, and how we interact with our friends. This does not mean that "incidental" contact is time wasted. It is just hard to be anything other than "incidental" if we do not take care to be intentional.

Incidental Contact

I hate telephones. I really hate cell phones. And I also have grown to despise blogs.

Now, I can explain why.

Ok, Ok, these wonders of technology are not the tools of the devil. I certainly do overstate my case very often. (It's called hyperbole, and it should be #14 on my list of improper online speech) I do have a telephone, a cell phone (it's prepaid), and a blog (duh). So it's not the tools themselves that I hate. It is the improper use of these tools that make me ill. Allow me to explain why these communication devices are pernicious influences on you and me.

When we use telephones, cell phones, and blogs, we are often using them to communicate with people we already know. These established relationships are maintained through the contact these tools provide. Phones and cell phones are great because they make "keeping in touch" more convenient. Cell phones make it ridiculously easy to call somebody literally anytime. They have a cell, you have a cell. You can call while standing in line, walking home from class, stuck in traffic, etc. And this is precisely where the problem begins.

On the one hand, all I need to do to talk to you is pull the phone out of my pocket. How nice. On the other had, all I need to do to talk to you is pull the phone out of my pocket. How incidental. I don't need to go out of my way to make contact. I don't need to set aside time out of my otherwise busy day. If you are not there, it's no big deal. If you don't call me back, I am not waiting by the phone anyway. I am just doing what I was already doing. Our personal contact was not anything important. It was merely incidental to who I am and what I am already doing.

I recently realized that blogs also make our online contact incidental to who we are as persons. Instead of actually going out of my way to contact you, to speak directly to you and hear from you in return, I can just blog whatever I am thinking about. If you happen to stumble across it, you and I renew our incidental relationship. I blog when I want, and you read when you want. Nothing essential to our lives is taking place here. It's all incidental.

Human beings are not things that have relationships. Humans are those relationships. We are defined by our human relationships. There is no "me" without my wife, mother and father, siblings, other family members, and friends, even colleagues. When we think there is a "me" that stands above these defining relationships, we are in for trouble. The last thing I need is encouragement to make contact with the people most important to me seem "incidental" to what "I" was doing. So, that is why I do not carry a cell phone.

What do I do now with this blog?

Rules for My Online Speech

As I and a few trusted companions venture forth on a collaborative blog, I find myself in need of setting up a few ground-rules for my online speech. It seems that the Internet can easily lead one down the path of misunderstanding. The scariest part is that many people go down that path willingly. Here are a few rules I am cooking up to prevent you from misunderstanding me, but also these rules will prevent me from forgetting what I am doing here in the first place.

1) No questions can asked of a reader with an answer already in mind. Hypothetical questions notwithstanding, to ask a question merely in order to correct the response of the answerer is highly inappropriate.
2) Posing a question as a pretext for a soapbox is all wrong.
3) Unnecessary technical jargon will be avoided unless the term is thoroughly explained. Assuming that the audience knows what I am referring to is not allowed.
4) "You got your hair cut today" Statements of fact intended to avoid the conversation that needs to take place are unacceptable.
5) Red herrings smell very poor. Off-topic pronouncements are not allowed.
6) Triangulation in a debate is in poor taste. Making questionable associations between the opposed party and a distasteful third party in order to short-cut the actual debate is sick and wrong. Just because politicians do it does not make it right.
7) The "rhetoric of excess" is not an acceptable tactic. Taking a valid point and over-extending it in order to short-circuit actual conversation is a poor move. Ex: "The Church needs to engage society in order to transform it." "Yes, because society is so sick and messed up" Nothing good can come of this.
8) Ad hominen (which I must now explain, see #3). Responding to an argument with a personal attack is rude and counter-productive.
9) Attributing an unecessary label in order to undermine an otherwise positive statement.
Ex: "The female pilot who landed the plane did a good job." What, should we be surprised?
10) No point is too small to be appreciated, nor is any point too large to be undermined.
11) Playing the devil's advocate in secret, adopting a contrary position just to argue a point and feel vindicated by the attention, is to be avoided.
12) Nobody wins when someone just gives up trying to be understood. Conceding an argument verbally without being entirely convinced destroys community rather than preserves it.

Some of these rules will be more helpful, some were just for fun. I do, however, pledge to honor these rules. You can hold me to it (please).

This is a very rough draft in need of both editing and suggestions. To be continued...